I can't let it get to me. I have to continue on. The good news is that I rewrote part of Celeste today while I had a few minutes to spare. I am pleased with what I did and I'm feeling confident again. I think I'm finally emerging from the fog that had blinded me to the scene's possibilities. My problem, which I hope writing this blog will help me, is getting over the fear of what other people will think. You'd think that at my age I'd be over it already -- I'm not. I know this plays a big part in how I express myself and has been a big problem the past couple of years. 'Why do you want to become a writer then,' you are probably asking the question. One day I hope I can answer it for you.
I notice that just when I'm close to a character's truth or when I think I'm doing really well, my brain shuts down. I can't find the words. My sentences come out all jumbled. I have to really pray about it, to have this fear removed from me. Obviously I'm being led along this path by something greater than me. Call it what you will, but a path is being laid out in front of me, which I'm gladly following. The path has taken me to England and back to the U.S. Let me explain.
When I started on this journey and finally committed to becoming the writer I"ve always wanted to be, I started looking online for some online writing groups. Lo and Behold I found the Thresholds Short Story Forum on Facebook. Something about it intrigued me and I followed the link to its web page and I found a treasure trove of wonderful articles, author Q&A, interviews, links -- I thought I had died and gone to heaven. And Loree Westron and Alison MacLeod both welcomed me with open arms and even though the website is geared towards post-graduate students I was welcomed to participate. What a joy and a blessing this has been. This is where I 'virtually' met Tania Hershman. Another wonderful writer and human being. She also has a wonderful blog which I'd previously given you a link to or actually she did because I still haven't learned how to do this.
Anyway, just suffice to say that now I'm enjoying another author's web page, a friend of Tania's Vanessa Gebbie -- this happened just today, who in turn turned me on to Patricia Ann McNair's blog who is from CHICAGO...so here I am back in the U.S. again. Sorry to have taken so long to get to this point. But Vanessa Gebbie has a great discussion on this link about the Short Story:
SHORT STORIES - HOW, WHY, and ARE THEY A GOOD TRAINING GROUND FOR NOVELISTS?
Again people, please copy and paste. I still haven't figured out how to add a LINK! Sorry